Day 147-151 Two down - two more to go...then B-Day

Yes, I've done a couple more solo 5km runs. It's still not "easy" - however, I am determined to run the full circuit each time now that I know I can do it. The music keeps my interest up when I feel like flagging it. And that home stretch is always a buzz! I look forward to that each time! I still haven't cracked under the 40 minute mark though. I'm sure I could do it if I stuck to the flat road route instead of making the ups and downs of the dunes part of my circuit. And I may do that tomorrow just to tick that off my list. Then throw the watch away for awhile. Especially for the Birthday Run - I think that day I just want to have some fun with the running and anyone who comes along and not worry about the speed. I'll see how I feel about that on the day.

I'm missing my running buddy - Bruce has pulled a muscle in his calf and is nursing that back to health. He's been training in the new Vibram 5-Finger shoes for "bare foot running". They take some getting used to and he may have pushed himself a bit too long and hard in his usual enthusiastic way. He's hoping to be ready to run with me by Saturday but it could be touch and go. When I suggested that we walk the circuit so we could do it together he said NO WAY!! You run girl! And he'll meet me near the end so we can come in together. Or...? We'll see how it all unfolds.

Two things I am looking for on the day that would make running easier: A clear blue sun-shiny sky. And NO earthquakes! 

If there ever was an excuse for pulling out of something and not getting through to the end, it is these never ending bloody earthquakes/aftershocks. They keep shaking us around at any time of the day or night to set off intense adrenalin rushes that make carrying on or going back to sleep hard. Our ground continues to liquify to further sink our houses and roads and we remain barred from entry to our once beautiful and now thoroughly "munted" city. It continues to be very distressing for me - I tell myself to just get over it and get on with life. But my experience on that day of the really big quake in February did traumatise me and continues to affect my day to day behaviour and thinking.

When I finally accepted that the effects of this trauma were not easing up as quickly as I expected, I decided to get some help. It took me awhile to reach out cause I'm usually the helper, not the helpee! For a few weeks now I've been having regular massage and energy balancing sessions (great for my running legs and feet too!)  I've also learned some new grounding and stabalizing exercises. And I'm so pleased that my Pilates classes were able to start up again once our venue was given the safety all clear. So that's where you'll find me on Friday mornings. There's lots more healing modalities on offer out there and I'll be finding and regularly using ones that suit me from now on.

So I've gradually used the earthquake experience to galvanise me into action ie. running, rather than rolling over and giving up. Well, the real truth is that the first week I was too afraid to go far from the house! The next week, when I went out running, I carried all my emergency gear with me in case I needed to make a dash for higher ground. The tsunami in Japan? Well, I was paralyzed with fear (we live by the beach!) and didn't sleep for a week. We escaped to Hanmer Hot Springs to give me a break - and stayed an extra couple of nights till I could bring myself to return "home". We had agents in to see about either selling or renting our house and leaving the area and I've been spending time getting the house de-cluttered and looking really good and "ready" for new owners. However, as the months have passed I've realised that nothing is going to happen quickly - the whole city is in limbo as we await the rebuild decisions. Instead, I have made myself ultra prepared for emergency and/or evacuation which in turn helps me relax. I'm always ready, which allows me to focus on other things. Neat little paradox eh?!

Judy Thoughts: I think I've said it all for now! All I need to do now is focus on 2 more training runs (Tuesday and Thursday) and then have fun on my birthday (Saturday).

Day 140-146 Keeping up the momentum to B-day

To start, I thought I'd share some photos of the amazing environment I get to run through!

I've been running every other day, looking for ways to "improve" on my 5km of running. I've now added in running along the top of the dunes, which is harder with the ups and downs. Also, I've been working at getting my time under 40 minutes for the 5km circuit. I was so close in my last run at 40:25. I figured a few seconds faster here and there on each km and I'll do it. I was so disappointed on the next run, after pushing myself at certain places, that I ran it in "only" 41:55. And I had to laugh at myself! I just ran for 5 km for goodness sakes!! What's to be disappointed?!!

Maybe the best "improvement" I could look for is actually enjoying the running. I always feel fantastic at the end - a real "wow" rush as I sprint through the home gate and feel proud that I've done it again.

But the run itself? As I start out it's not easy as my body works very hard to get going. The middle section is just a hard plod and the last part is grim determination to complete the run so I can say I did it. (Hmmmm... I hope this isn't a metaphor for life?!!)

Doesn't sound like much fun, does it?! Yet I have discovered in myself a certain perverse pleasure in pushing my physical limits - which I have yet to understand. And I have used strategies which have helped change my state of mind - such as listening to music, chanting rhythmic positive "mantras" in time to my steps and something as simple as looking up.

Judy Thoughts: The good bits I can easily recognise? Sharing this experience with Bruce. The environment I run through is spectacular. Being supported with encouraging words from so many people. And the weather has been very kind to me over the last 4 1/2 months. I've only used the treadmill twice when it was especially cold and rainy.

Day 137 - 139 Solo 5km

Whew, that took some effort today! I headed out on my 5km circuit on my own. No Bruce. It was all up to me to keep moving along and there were several times that I felt like stopping and walking. And a couple of times I was ready to cut it short and head home. I pushed myself through the "head stuff" in the end.

A few things that helped me run the whole distance.

1.This blog and the people that I know are reading it. I knew that I would be writing about my run tonight. Along the way, I thought about what I could say and knew that I wanted to be able to write and share with you that I ran the whole 5km. Thank-you out there for helping to hold me accountable to my goal!  You have been so interested and supportive. I want to give you a reason to smile and be proud!

2. I didn't want to let myself down. This has been a huge effort with lots of important learnings and I really want to see it through successfully. So keeping going was so important - especially at this stage. 17 more sleeps, 7 more training runs - and then it's my day. I have to be ready. So now, stopping along the way is not really an option.

3. The music that was playing in my ears. It was energetic and positive. And I don't know the playlist well enough yet to know what's coming next - so there was some anticipation involved. I can see that putting it on shuffle and varying the content will be useful to keep my interest up.

4. My watch. I crossed the finish line in 40minutes 40seconds. When I saw 36 minutes on my watch I stepped up the pace cause I was so close by that point. I really wanted to cross the finish line in 40minutes or less. I didn't quite make it. But I know I can do it now. I just need to step up the pace a little bit at times during the run.

Judy Thoughts:   #1-4 above

Day 133 - 136 Another 5km

I've done a couple of runs since my last write up. There was a shorter one two days ago with music urging me on. I enjoyed the variety of my selections - although the pace wasn't always quite right. So rather than try to run to the beat I just felt the energy of the music push me along.

Then today I headed out with Bruce determined to put in another 5km effort. With just 3 weeks to go before my birthday run, I really do need to be sure I am in a good place to do my run so I am not totally buggered by the end! After all, I may want to party up a bit afterwards!

No music today. That's the back-up strategy for when Bruce is busy. Having him with me and being able to chat a bit is the best support for me at the moment. While heading south over the dune track, he and the sun were just behind me but his shadow was right beside me. That was kind of fun.

The new element I added today was to run the portion of the dune track that I usually walk before dipping down to the flat track. This meant doing some incline work while running. That got me puffing more and my body handled the ups and downs pretty well. I carried on to complete 5.5 km. in 45 minutes. So I am feeling very satisfied with myself.

Judy Thoughts: The countdown is on - 19 more sleeps. That means keeping fit, healthy and injury free for another 8 training runs before my first "public" event. I'm feeling confident and excited.

Day 125 - 132 Let there be Music!!

Well, it's been a busy week as I sort out how to wire myself up to music for running.

I had some fun sorting through my iTunes library to find music that will keep me energised when I run by myself. I was finding that on my own I was feeling a bit bored - despite the beautiful landscapes I was running through. 40 minutes on the trot was getting just a bit tedious when I didn't have someone along to share the experience.

So to perk me up I thought I'd try out some music to keep me smiling and moving along at a good clip. I made up a Running playlist of about 50 possibilities - then spent an hour and a half on the treadmill trying them all out. Whew, that was a great workout in itself! I was looking for songs that had a strong beat that would match my running speed. And also songs that had words that would feed me positive messages. Also a few just for the fun of them and/or the feel-good memories they brought back to me. So I narrowed it down to 20 songs - 4 that are good for walking energetically to warm up and then 16 to keep me moving between 7.5 and 9km per hour. Yes, I'm going to see if I can use music to get my 5km done a bit faster now.

So I've got my music playlist on the computer ready to go. The next step was to sort out the hardware - to start with, earbuds that would stay in my ears. I must have wierd ears cause the usual earbuds fall out even if I'm just sitting still. A headset seemed ridiculous to run in. However, my ever resourceful daughter told me about a great sports set that loops over the ears and holds the buds solidly in place. I found them! They work!

Then I found a tiny MP3 player with a display screen. It was beautiful - metalic purple and seemed just the right size and had a big clip on the back to secure it while running. And 4GB!! And only $30!! Wow, I was getting excited. Yes, I can hear you all shouting out - but you need an iPod shuffle to use your iTunes music! This I discovered as I was walking out the shop door - the saleman happened to mention to this technophobe that I'd need a converter that I could "easily" download and use to convert iTunes to the MP3 fomat and blah, blah, blah... My heart sank - getting too complicated now. I just wanted some music to wire into my ears. Bruce said he was sure we could work it out. So we kept walking.

Ha!! Several hours later after much Googling for info, I actually found what I needed in the iTunes Help file! In 3 quick steps I added an MP3 converter to the Advanced drop down menu and converted my 20 songs. Then I had to find them! That was another saga - but they're in a special file now. And finally there they were on my little MP3 player! Then had to learn how to work that little sucker! Geez. However, I felt very proud of myself after all that for calmly working through the techno-tangle to get there in the end.

So time to give it a go! I set the player to my walking songs and head off - very energetically (I think they are really running songs! I have to rein myself in a bit!) I arrive at the clocktower all pumped up and ready to start my run. Once there, I switch to the running songs and head off. I'm pelting along, a huge smile on my face, the fast beat carrying me forward, seeing myself flick off a 30 minute 5km. No problem. And then the music stops. What?! I shake my new friend and press all the buttons to try to bring it to life but ... I find that the battery is dead! I just can't believe that after all I've been through, I have no music now on my first outing!! I laugh aloud at myself and laugh some more. I console myself with  ... it is a bit tricky to turn off and I must have left it on all day by mistake. Geez. Well, I keep running but it's not quite the same.

Two days later, it's a chilly wintry afternoon so I opt for the treadmill. I wire myself up to a - yes - fully charged MP3 and set off, racing like a mad thing to keep up with the music! Ah Judy, I just have to keep laughing - very kindly - at myself!

Judy Thoughts: I think this week has been about persistance. Keep doing it until you get the results - whether it is a 5km run or getting music into my ears or anything else I set myself to accomplish.

Day 123 - 124 Rest day then a short run.

Didn't feel much like going out today. Felt tired, a bit queasy and grumpy too. A couple of earth shakes through the night meant not the best sleep. And then in the morning I rode in the van for the Herekeke Club, helping to pick up elderly folk through the eastern suburbs to take them to "The Club" for a day out. The roads through these areas keep shifting and sinking and, despite the heroic efforts being made by the roadworks teams, it was a very bumpy ride with unexpected detours from closed streets lengthening our journey. I also find it distressing to see yet more empty spaces where there used to be familiar landmarks - whole blocks of damaged shops have been demolished and cleared away since last week.

But I had decided when I woke up that it would be a run day and it had been in the back of my mind all day. So when 4pm rolls around, I get dressed in my gear and set out. Bruce joins me. I said from the outset that I thought it would be a short one cause I still wasn't feeling great but was open to seeing what would happen once I got outside and moving. The fresh air and ocean and estuary views perked me up. The running went well and I moved along and breathed fairly easily. However, at 20 minutes of running I decided that was enough and switched to walking. 

As we headed down our street and were within sight of home, we saw a friend delivering our weekly supply of organic vegetables. So I decided to put on a spurt to do my sprint through the gate! Thought I'd let him see how I usually end a run! It made me laugh - a great way to finish off.

Judy Thoughts: I don't have to push myself every time I go out. It is enough to know that I now can choose to run or not to get to my destination.

Day 117 - 122 I think I felt an Endorphin!

Well, I've pulled myself together after that last run in the heat that didn't go so well. Two days later I did a 5km all on my own, heading north and circling round through New Brighton. I almost pealed off for home and clock in a 30 minute =  3.5km run but when I scanned myself and checked out how I was feeling, I realised I had more in me. So I kept on running to clock up 40 minutes = 5km of running. I felt quite proud of myself to keep myself going without the support of my running buddy. It was so easy to just say - enough's enough. Just head home.

I put off running for a few days cause I managed to poke a stick in my eye while I was pruning the raspberries! My eye felt very bruised and looked terrible - a bloody red area spread out over the white of the eye for a few days and it ached quite a lot. I feel so fortunate that I did no major damage - a very close call!! A few ml to the centre and I'd be telling a different story right now.

So today, I set out with Bruce to do the old dune and estuary circuit. We did a warm up walk along the top of the dunes where brisk winds and noisy ocean felt very invigorating. We talked about me getting some warmer gear sorted - hat and gloves, long pants and warmer top will be needed as winter sets in. I'll need to be prepared for anything by the 4th June.

Then we drop down to the quiet and calm of the sheltered dune track, along to Bridge Street and up to the Estuary walkway. We ignore the signs that told us the walkway was closed - I wanted to see all the earthworks that have been done to build up the shoreline that has sunk from the earthquake. Tons of earth have been brought in to build up the shoreline to prevent flooding of the nearby streets and houses.

The first part of the run I was struggling a bit - working hard, breathing heavily. I find my "second wind", as my daughter descibed it. The running becomes easier. I have to remember that it takes me 5-10 minutes to get my lungs and other muscles warmed up and working well.

Bruce comments that I always keep a steady pace. I don't even think about it.  I wonder if it is the musical part of me that provides a steady "metronome" beat in some way. I concentrate mostly on my breathing. Deep intakes, strong pushing out. Relax my shoulders and chest to allow the flow to happen.

I decide I really want to get to 40 minutes today so we make up a new route that keeps me going for awhile longer - in fact longer than I had intended. Through New Brighton to Lonsdale, east to Marine Parade and back home. I could have stopped at the Clocktower and done my 5km but something in me said .. you feel good, all is going well, your next breath will be there, you are not in any pain ... so, just keep running till you get home. So I kept chugging away until I got to my street and then .. I speed up to sprint through the gate to home!! 47 minutes of running!!

I think I felt an endorphin at that point!! Very exhilerating. I laughed and puffed away to catch my breath, walked in circles around the back yard to calm down, enjoyed my stretches, reveling in my accomplishment!!

Judy Thoughts: Sometimes I think back to the beginning of this venture, January 2011- when I'd be mentally shaking my head and saying ... This is crazy. This is impossible. I can only run for 2 minutes at a time!There is no way I can run for 45 minutes without stopping. Well, 4 months on and I've actually done it. And I still mentally shake my head at the wonder of it. And I give myself a big pat on the back and have a huge grin on my face!!!